Happy New Years From Soulful Cora, Giggly Caterina And Bubbly Pat, Plus A Black-Bottomed Secret Song!

Happy New Years, everyone! 2020 was awful, wasn't it? But guess what? If you live in the United States, 2021 has already smirked, rolled its eyes and said, "Hold my beer." We are all Angela Bassett getting burned by our relaxer. Can it get any worse? At this point, we desperately need the dulcet tones from a singer who's been there and back.

Fancy Miss Nancy Is Back, Plus Gloria's Blues, Barry's Beat, Spooky Webb And A Sunny Grace Secret Song!

Can Nancy ever be too fancy? Of course not. There can, however, be too many hooker-themed Halloween costumes. Must everything be whorey on Halloween? And that's coming from me. Anywaywe'regettingofftrack, there's too much of many things these days, but too much Fancy Nancy? GTFOH.

End Of Summer Bonanza To Get You Through The Heat, Plus A Three Sisters Secret Song!

We're deep into summer, which can only mean one thing: we need hot tunes to cool off. Why? 'Cause I tell you, it's gettin' raunchy out there. Raunchy!

Cult Movie Jams, Billie's Box, Mancini Madness, Plus Bad, Bad Girls, A Halloweenie Surprise, And A Juicy Secret Song!

The first time I saw "Blue Velvet" was the first showing on its first day of release. The theatre was sparsely populated; just me, a friend, and few Upper East Side golden agers who weren't at all prepared for what soon unspooled. I wasn't, either.

Swingin' Barry, Georgia's Nibs, A Big Howdee From Minnie, A Classic Crime Scene, Plus An Oh-So-Very-Blue Secret Song!

Today post is full of laughs and romance and danger! But first, a little intrigue by way of John Barry's kicky 1965 score for "The Knack And How To Get It," a groovalicious soundtrack with funky organ, xylophone, a fabulously overactive percussion section and a horn section that'll  - pow! - blow you into kingdom come.

The movie, which is actually pretty good, is all about "Swingin' London" in the 1960's - mods! hippies! rockers! - and stars Rita Tushingham, the movie's "Jo" from "Taste Of Honey," so you know it's going to be so far out. And Barry's music jacks it all up. Did I say far out? I think I did. Trust me. You'll love it.

Speaking of groovy and all kinds of fine, say hello to Miss Georgia Gibbs:

In the Exclusively Cheerful Nibs! posting, Miss Gibbs herself - who started her career by performing jazz and R&B covers, then moved on to pop - starts off this 1966 collection with a wonderfully snazzy version of "Something's Got To Give." But my favorite is her take on "Do It Again." Not many singers can sound so scrubby clean, yet so down low and dirty, at the same time, but somehow Miss Gibbs pulls it off.

In the mood for a giggle? Me, too. So 'cmon, now, pull up a bucket of chicken and a box of wine, cuz Minnie's got a few story's to tell ya'.

I'd never really followed the career of Minnie when I was mini myself, but when I happened upon the 1963 comedy LP "Howdee! Cousin Minnie Pearl, The Gal From Grinder's Switch At The Party" something told me to grab it.

In this Cheerfully Downhome Exclusive!, Minnie chats about her booze-swillin' Uncle Naybob, sings a few songs, like "How To Catch A Man" ("Hog tie 'im!") and chitchats about her own looks. "A feller told me I looked like a fresh breath of spring," she says, then meekly corrects herself. "Well, actually, he didn't use those words, he said I looked like the end of a hard winter." Plus, she talks all about her "good friend Elvis." How can you go wrong?

I've always held a special place in my heart for film noir (and John Garfield, the ultimate dumb-luck hunk).

And yet it's not just the skewed camera angles, concealing shadows or nefarious storylines that have pulled me in. The danger-girl jazz-infused music adds to the fun, too, and most of it makes for great listening (even out of context).

"Crime Scene USA" is hard to beat in this regard with its collection of tunes from classics like "Double Indemnity" and "Mildred Pierce," to name just two, by a Who's Who of composers such as Alfred Newman, Miklos Rozsa, Max Steiner, Franz Waxman, Elmer Bernstein and even Marvin Hamlisch. It's perfect for a rainy Sunday afternoon, but really, any day is a bad-girl good day for music like this.

Some time ago, The Secret Song File was crowned Miss Sausage Queen USA, and, yes, I know what you're thinking, and yes, you'd be right. How else do you think Beauty Queens win their crowns? They're not getting down on their knees for the Lord (rim-shot!) (oh, no I di'nt!).

What in hell's bells does that have to do with today's musical offering (or anything, really)? Beats me. So anyhoo, let's give today's hints in pictures! This popular jazz songstress with a poppin' new CD has THIS as a first name, plus a last name which sounds like the moniker of THIS chateau. OMG, was that supereasy or what?

Right, so when we start talking sausages and supereasy, it's time to hit the trail. 

Tell me if you've ever been crowned (and for what) in the comments. I swear I won't judge (too much)!

Etta's Hollarin', Barry's Orchestrating, B'Way's Gettin' Nudie, Plus A Secret Song From Maya's Godmother!

Etta Jones is not Etta James (let's clear that up right away). Have you heard of her? I hadn't until several years ago when my Cuban Luvuh introduced me to her - and I've been hooked ever since. She's another one of those singers who was popular with mass-market audiences for a bit, forgotten, then rediscovered, to a certain extent, through YouTube and blog sites (see, we're good for something). She was never forgotten by jazz aficionados, though. They've been devoted all along.

Born in the 1920's and coming into her own professionally in the 40's and 50's, Etta endured grim years of struggle - performing at night with a 'who's who' of jazz performers, then toiling at factory and store jobs during the day. Later, she partnered with sax legend Houston Person for nearly thirty years on the road, primarily for black audiences, with a non-stop schedule that took her all over the world until a mere two weeks before her death. Never the diva, she was just as devoted to her fans as they to her. Yet mass-market fame eluded her. She had just one hit, "Don't Go To Strangers," though she did earn three Grammy Awards.

So what do all those jazz aficionados know that we don't? You'll find out big-time in 1962's "Hollar," my absolute favorite LP of hers. She's sometimes compared to Billie Holiday, but I've always found her smoother (something Holiday wasn't interested in) and more outwardly joyful, too (the first track, "And The Angels Sing," never fails to bring a huge smile to my face). She had her own way with tone and phrasing, too, and found herself likened in her heyday not other singers, but horn players. You can hear that clearly in her take on "They Can't Take That Away From Me," in which she slides up and down the notes instead of hitting them straight on. It's just gorgeous.

The original Bond, in the form of Sean Connery, arrived on the scene with a striking soundtrack from a movie music master.

Mary, Queen of Scots, in the form of Glenda Jackson, ruled with music from this master, too (and, yes, Jackson was a much fiercer Queen than Cate Blanchett).

What could a Queen and a spy have in common? John Barry, of course, who gave Bond his memorable theme and sound. In "The Concert John Barry" - a Barry-Barry-Wonderful Cheerful Exclusive! - the Bond theme has more power and bombast than it's ever had before, and that's just for starters. Included also are gorgeous renditions of "The Day Of The Locust," "Mary, Queen Of Scots" and "The Deep," to name just a few. Better still, they're all conducted by Barry himself.

Years ago, I was an eager little sprite in NYC and "Oh, Calcutta," an allegedly "sexy," "controversial" Broadway show (nude actors!), was on its last legs. You could always get half-price tickets for it at TKTS, yet even for half-price, I didn't want to go, or even for free (by way of "second-acting" it, or sneaking in during intermission, mingling with the crowd and unobtrusively taking a seat) (I don't think you can do that anymore) (which is a real shame) (it was the best way to see "Cats"). I had been warned by everyone: "Oh, Calcutta" was terrible.

But little did I know, a much better sex show had opened just after "Oh, Calcutta." It was called (ahem) "Let My People Come."

Like its more popular counterpart, "Let My People Come" had lots of nudity, but it also had original songs, with titles like "Come In My Mouth," "Take Me Home With You," "I'm Gay," and "The Cunnilingus Champion Of Company C." And here's the kicker: the show actually received good reviews during its original run Off-Broadway (though the producer never officially opened the show in order to avoid getting bad ones) and a nearly sold-out run. But a later move to Broadway killed it. Unfortunately.

Strangely, the show is about to be revived in NYC (with "much with less nudity," says the producer) (talk about a buzz-kill). And really, why revive the show? As you'll realize when you listen to the original cast LP, most of the charm comes from the fact that it sounds very much of its time. It's naughty, yes, but surprisingly innocent, too, in a shaggy-cool, early-70's sort of way. and I doubt that can be recaptured in a ("less nude") revival.

The Secret Song File likes to get nudie, too, but not in public. That's just tacky (and you know how the Secret Song File just hates tackiness). Besides, I doubt Lady Tee, as she was known to her fans, would have walked the ho stroll naked, either (but if anyone has a picture of this, I'd love to see it). What she would have done is sashay through crowds like the Secret Song File is doing below; blowing a kiss, and with this week's date du jour:

"Lady Tee," you say? "Um, isn't she dead?" Yes, she is. She left us just last year, in fact. But that hasn't stopped the upcoming release of her new album, and yes, she's still a sucker for your love - and still white, too, though her audiences never minded (nor did Maya Rudolph; Lady Tee was her godmother). Oh, and did you know? One of her hobbies was archery.

Enjoy the Golden Globes tonight! 

Perfect Globes Game: Spot the celebrity drug-dealer. Let me know in the comments below who you think it is (in years past, it was Darryl Hannah) (but there must be someone new).