Judy's Smilin' Singles, Fran's First Time, The Crown Swoons, Plus Kitty Meows And An Achy Breaky Daughter Secret Song!

Judy's got an itch, ya'll! Itch, Judy, itch!

But seriously, how is it possible that there's even more "new Judy?" But there is, sort of, in this gorgeously remastered compilation of her singles from the late 1930s to the late 40s, and yes, it's a Joyfully Judy Cheerful Exclusive! just for you and yours (and your little dog too!). There's even a few previously unreleased, alternate tracks, which is always fascinating, but may I go on a teensy rant for a moment? Why do compilers insist on placing alternate tracks right after the original track? It's like eating a bonbon, having someone extract it from your gullet, then push it back down your mouth-hole. Stop! Mix it up, compilers! It's why I usually press "shuffle" whenever I listen to this collection. 

That aside, this is Judy in her first prime, and while she had several "primes" (obvi), I continue to be astonished by how polished she sounded in her early years. Yes, she got even better, but really, has any singer in any genre had a starting point this outstanding, or this soulful and technically refined? As a child and a tween, for Christ's sakes?  

If Judy's talent continues to shine through the ages, some singers got one shot and found themselves banished to oblivion. But not at The Cheerful! And so, without further ado, please meet Fran Lacey. 

"Whoooooo?" you ask, which is what I asked myself when I stumbled upon this LP and its cover with Fran looking like "Miss Nicey-Nice Mom At The Neighbor's Backyard Shindig" (too pure for a Key Party, but, yes, she really did down that entire bottle of Chardonnay) which isn't exactly an insult (of course it is), only to say that it doesn't, how shall I put it, promise swingin' vocal  thrills. 

Her backstory is not promising. She was actually Mrs. Fran Menns (I guess the "Lacey" was meant to hint at sexytimes?), a dutiful suburban housewife who sang in her high school choir and was introduced by friends to Russ Malloy, a VP at Bel Canto Records, an obscure, Ohio-based company best known for their "stereo demonstration" vinyl records. Again, not promising. Even reviewers at the time seemed to warn me away. "Obviously untrained," said reviewer John Thorton of Fran's record in HiFi Review magazine. "She has the voice (but) no technique." 

And yet - and yet - in this Finally Fran Cheerful Exclusive! for you and yours, I'm more than pleased to report that her set of songs are genuinely entertaining. No, for reals. If anything, her lack of slick, studio-style technique is a plus. She sounds less pre-digested than a lot of the vocalists of the period, her emotions deeper and unaffected. She would have been a pleasure to encounter again. 

UPDATE: Oopsie on my part. I mislabeled some titles 'n' such in Fran's LP and was luckily alerted by our friend Publius in the comments. Now you can click Fran and be assured that you're getting everything correctomundo. So do thank Publius in the comments, would ya'? 'Cause while I'm purty, I do make boo-boos now and again. 

Are you watching "The Crown?" I'm shocked - shocked, I tell you - that the actress they hired to play Camilla Parker Bowles doesn't look like this: 

What? They're going for realism, aren't they? Well, aren't they? 

But I digress. A lot of ink has been spilled about how "damaging" the show is to the British royals. "So unfair!" they cry. Really? They wouldn't be trying to deflect from other issues, would they? 

But I digress (again!) (I must behave!). Anywayhypocritesareeverywhere, the show is gorgeously produced, as always, impeccably performed, and the music by Martin Phipps is a marvel of dark mood with glistening surfaces. Just listen to "Simple Harp Variation No. 1," with its delicate harp veneer - and that ominous vocal undertow, which suggests a slow-motion, unrelenting collapse, much like Diana's reign. It's one of the finer soundtracks I've heard in ages. 

Do you love Kitty like I love Kitty? Bet'cha do. 

Did you know Kitty had a twin sister? Her name was Maudie. Both started their careers in vaudeville at the age of three - three! - and while Maudie later sang with Duke Ellington's band, only Kitty continued with her career into adulthood. Kitty, as you know, was quite popular with sophisticated West Coast hepcats at supper clubs and other venues, sang and danced with Elvis in the movie "King Creole," and released several outstanding LPs. 

It's a wonder she's not talked about more, since, by anyone's measure, she was a remarkable vocal stylist. Her elegantly aloof, yet subtly ornate, delivery is in full flower in this new release, which includes songs from her first 1955 album, along with plenty of wonderful extra tracks. It's a must. 

The Secret Song File, freelance spy gal that she is, was recently hired to find missing votes, fake votes, uncounted votes. She looked everywhere. And nada. Hahahahaha! Happy Holidays, everyone! "Them's the breaks," she told her supersad employer, along with, "I'd like to be paid in cash." 

What did she have playing on her earbuds while spying and searching? Just the very latest from this pop singer who has a somewhat annoying public persona - gurl, stop sticking your tongue out, it's soooo tired - yet keeps releasing good rockin' albums. And I stand by that. Did Liam miss out? Maybe not, but we get the terrific results of their messy coupling. 

She says she stopped burning spliffs, but I don't believe her. 

Smoke out in the comments, if you like!