Oct 18, 2013

Delicious Halloween Treats (No Rocks, I Swear!), Plus An Anniversary Secret Song!


Happy Halloween everyone! 'Tis the season for ghouls, witches, Republican House members (who so got gotten) and other horrors. Do you have a pumpkin yet? We don't. Did you buy some candy in case a few trick-or-treaters stop by? We haven't. I'd love to say there's still plenty of time, but stores already have Christmas displays set up, so, um, really, we all better hurry.

Remember Elvira? She's still kickin', you know. And vegetarian, I hear. Or some such. Any-hoo (or any-boo!), if you're just itchin' to get into the Halloween spirit, and I know you are, then you'll need some Elvira, especially this giggly 1983 LP, which brings together a host of witchy tunes, and Miss Elvira herself, who cackles through a few song intros. What's not to like?


Did you know? It's easy to scare children - and it's fun! And Halloween gives you a perfect excuse to do so, so don't miss out. Apropos to that, have you been to Disneyland or Disney World? Then of course you've gone through the Haunted House, where your reflection in a mirror comes back at you as a skeleton. 


To be honest, I never thought the Haunted House was all that scary as a young tot. The Haunted House soundtrack LP? That's a whole other matter. Even now (I swear), it's a little unnerving - so imagine what it will sound like to all those impressionable kids pounding on your door for candy. Remember, the younger they are, the easier they scare, so if they're under six, blast it. 


Speaking of Halloween, Scooby Doo mysteries were a staple of my Saturday morning cartoon watching. I was never frightened by them - not that they were intended to be scary - but then I was too busy flying on a screaming sugar high from Frosted-Cocoa-Sugar-Burp, or whatever I was scarfing down. Yes, I was mainlining as a child. Weren't we all?



Relive the sugar high with "Scooby Doo's Snack Tracks," which includes not just the theme song and music from the cartoon, but cuts from guest stars Davy Jones (!) and Jerry Reed (?).


Not everything should be scary on Halloween. How about a little sweet, too? Yes, it's the original soundtrack LP for Disney's 1961 film "The Parent Trap." And, no, I'm not talking about that awful remake starring Lindsay Lohan (which shall now forever be known as "The Parent Trap With Scabies!"), but the real deal with Hayley Mills. Wasn't she lovely?


Halloween is on a Thursday this year, which means many adult trick-or-treaters (ahem) will be taking Friday off to recover. Not to fret. A few aspirin, lots of water and some gentle Haley will chase that hangover away. Plus there's Tommy Sands and Annette Funnyjello Funicello, too!


Speaking of sugar rushes (we just were, weren't we?) (or am I speeding too fast?), here's more Hanna-Barbera. And by more, I don't mean just a li'l more, I mean a fantastic, Halloween-sized box set of theme songs, music and assorted noises and sound effects from just about any Hanna-Barbera cartoon you can imagine.


Currently, I have the "Top Cat" theme song as my ringtone, but who knows, I may change it to "Magilla Gorilla," or "The Jetsons," or maybe "Flintstones Jazz." Or maybe something called "Pixie And Dixie." It's crazy how much stuff is here. Be careful, though. Don't listen to this all the way through. Small doses, small does, or you really will get a rush, and it might not be reversible.


Yes, this is how the Secret Song File answers the door when she greets trick-or-treaters. Why change? And why not give kids what they really want. You know, good ganja (if they're of age), good vino, artisanal crackers, a wedge of Oussau-Araty and the finest sun-dried tomatos (it's time to upgrade stoner food). And just so they'll know what cool R&B used to sound like, the 20th anniversary collection of a late 80's/early 90's girl group.


Don't pretend you don't know who they are. They made waterfalls (*cough*), warned you about scrubs 'n' such, and most of all, wanted everyone to be friends. Oh, and yeah, one more thing. One of the girls burned her boyfriend's house down - but c'mon, we've all been there (she's an angel in the sky now, so all is forgiven).

Happy Halloween, ya'll!

Say what you like in the comments, but no rocks!